Jersey City pimp 'Prince' pleads guilty, faces 20 years in prison | - NJ.com

Jersey City pimp 'Prince' pleads guilty, faces 20 years in prison | - NJ.com

In the immortal words of Kat Williams, "PIMP DOWN! PIMP DOWN!"

Co-Worker Awesomeness

Boss stands up and randomly shouts out names, after a long pause you hear, "Are you naming out the people that suck again?"

Tribute to Binge Drinking

(CNN) -- A Malaysian model who was sentenced last year to six strokes of a cane for drinking beer in public has had her sentence commuted, her lawyer said Thursday.

Kartika Sari Dewi Shukarno will now instead be required to perform three weeks of community service -- beginning Friday.

http://www.cnn.com/2010/WORLD/asiapcf/04/01/malaysia.beer.caning/index.html?eref=igoogle_cnn

"Ok so I am sitting here reading the local news!!!! Ready for this, 94 year old woman had 10 1/2 pound bags of pot strapped to her body while trying to cross back over the border! Amazing Thought I would share."

Gross

12. Vajazzling (thanks, Anne! This list is writing itself!) For the uninitiated, this is something that Jennifer Love Hewitt is trying to make happen, much like how Gretchen in Mean Girls tried to make "fetch" happen. The site (yes, it's real) defines "vajazzling" as "Bedazzlin your lady parts with crystals" There is so much wrong with that sentence, and we won't even get into the lack of an apostrophe. First off, let's start with the use of the verb "Bedazzlin'". Does anyone else recall that the Bedazzler looked like a giant staple gun? Are you suggesting I staple crystals onto my labia, Vajazzler? Also, why specify crystals? What else would you suggest I use? Candy buttons? Old 42-cent stamps? And finally, I don't have a vajina, nor do I want it "jazzled." The whole process reads like misspelled stage directions from a bargain basement porno. http://volcanicensemble.blogspot.com/2010/03/30-things-not-to-do-before-im-30-part.html

See Sausage Boy, I am not the only one! I for one don't enjoy the thought of a disco ball in my crotch. Next thing you know, I'll attract men with back hair and shoot cocaine out of my nipples.

Wow, there's a thought. I would make a mint.

Dedication

Catherine the Great of Russia kept her wig maker in an iron cage in her bedroom for more than three years.

Why? Did she smell bad? I would have hated to be the royal hair remover, Catherine would have kept me in the crapper.

I like Dolly's quote better.

“How long does it take to do your hair?” Answer: “I don't know – I'm never there. I've got more important things to do.”

Hawaii

I had a call once, I took it over. I was on this stupid call with her for over 4 hours.

I learned about her chickens, geese, crops, and the annual rainfall on her side of the Hawaii island.

I also found out that she was expecting baby goats.

I finally figure out her problem was her date and time on the computer are like 5 years in the past.

Yeah that does cause major problems. So, I fess up to her that I am an idiot and her problem is she is living in 2003. She decides it wasn't my fault and names a goat after me.

So there, have you had a goat named after you because of your job? Yeah, didn't think so.

Ping Pong Balls

Ping Pong Balls

So me and the Co-Workers were having a conversation on how many Ping Pong Balls a woman can fight in her vagina.

Me – “3. 4 is too many and 5 is right out.

CW1 – “nah, I say 5.”

Me – “ I have a vagina and I still don’t think you can comfortable walk around with more than 3 in your whoha.”

CW2 – “I just don’t think this is a question that has an answer. It is the ultimate riddle.”

Me – spots Cock Rocket- “Hey CR, how many ping pong balls can you fit in a vagina.”

CR – “7.”

All of us had no response because Cock Rocket said so, it must be true.

funny

That's what she said...

Gross

The other day I was thinking about the health benefits of toilet paper consumption, guess you can stay healthy with Charmine.